I’m Trying

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Human BodyI’m trying to stay off of government assistance.  I’m trying to keep working a full time job.  I’m trying to find a tech job with steady hours so I can really start exercising daily again.  With winter here, it only reminds me that I’m not the spunky skinny young man I once was.  And only half the man I was prior to February 2012.

Prior to that date, I only had high blood pressure and some asthma.  Neither seemed to slow me down much.  Even though I was overweight then, I was walking 3 miles a day and had been smoke free for a few years.

Since then, things have kind of declined.  As a customer once told me, “Getting old isn’t for the weak.”.  I can attest he wasn’t fucking kidding 😕

High Blood Pressure

OK I’ve had this for many years.  I think I started taking meds when I was like 32ish?  I wasn’t super heavy then, but I would have accepted the term, “fluffy”.  I know people try to say that I’m fluffy now, but it feels like a happy lie more than acceptance of the truth.


This hit me harder in Virginia than it does here.  Though it never really was a problem for the most part.  Even today.  Unless the humidity is like 80% or higher.  I’m sure if I was still skinny as I once was, it wouldn’t even be an issue.

Coronary Artery Disease

This one crept up on me.  I was finally taking a stand on my weight and walking every day.  I changed much of my eating habits, though I’m still a food lover sadly.  I’m thrilled to still be alive.  However, I can’t figure out how I dismissed my first heart attack as dehydration and just went home and took a nap.  The second one was the one where I crawled to the car and somehow drove to the hospital and crawled into the ER.  I know God had me because I only remember moments of the trip.  I praise the Mary Immaculate Hospital every day for their excellent care and Dr. John Paul Jones for saving my life 💓

Cartilage Loss / Osteoarthritis

This one happened just a few years ago.  Shortly before I worked where I do now.  I got called into work on my day off.  In my rush to get things caught up, I rushed to the truck and when I turned my foot stayed and my knee twisted.  Two loud cracks and I was on the ground.  I got 3 months off for a torn meniscus injury that seemed to never heal.  A year goes by with no improvement and I fire my doctor.  I got a new doctor and we started from scratch.  Turns out I destroyed a good hunk of cartilage in my knee and it developed Osteoarthritis.  So it will never really heal.  I can get a replacement knee if I lose more weight.  When it gets cold or humid, I wear a brace to ease the pressure and use a cane to walk around.

Plantar Fasciitis

Because of all that limping I do, it has caused this fun problem.  My right knee is jacked up, so my left leg takes all the heavy lifting and pressure.  Causing the tissue on the bottom of my foot to tear.  It’s like walking on shards of glass at times.  When it gets too bad, I take a week off work and eat some savings to get it healed up.

Bone Spurs

This started last winter.  My forearms started bruising and feeling very achy.  Especially if I carried things on my arms and holding more in my hands.  Like a waiter would do.  When I had it checked out, it was spurs on my forearm bones.  Most people get them on their feet or hands.  I got them on my arms.  Not a big deal.  Yet.


Now you talk about a pain that can bring you to your knees.  Literally.  Your lower back on fire and you can barely walk.  I’m currently heavily medicated for it.  I’m scarred what will happen when the 30 days of pain reliever stops.  I have some Lidocaine patches.  But I sit a lot.

So when you add all that up, there are days I’m a mess.  I don’t want to be someone who bleeds the tax payers dry while I watch life go by.  The only upside to that situation, is I could exercise daily.  But I want to hold out as long as I can before I succumb to that life.


About Denny

Musician. Gamer. Evil Genius. I'm also a Second Amendment Supporter. A Privacy Advocate. I can also do Web Design, Graphic Manipulation, Video Editing, some PHP Scripting and much more.