MMO The Movie

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I’m the kind of person who has a million and one things going on in my head all the time.  From real life, to work and of course, everyday dreaming.  Everywhere in between.  For the past 2 years or so now, my life playing games has become a bit stagnant.  I’ve been focused on all the other things going on in my life.  As much as I want to sit down and enjoy a video game, something always puts it off to where all I end up doing is futzing around.  This is mostly due to my old gaming friends and I have parted ways.  Some because they started playing other games.  As well as, due to my real life finances being very tight and/or the fact the games they chose to play, I either am unable to follow them or I just don’t care for the games they chose to play.

My time alone has led me to thinking there is a pot of gold to be made.  Sadly not by me as I don’t have the capitol to get it started.  So this idea of mine is going to go public.  If I’m very lucky, they can kick me a small percentage for giving them the inspiration.

There are tons of movies out right now that are modeled after comic books, such as the Avengers series (Iron Man, Thor, etc…).  As well as video games (Doom, Resident Evil, etc…).

Now, let’s take some National Lampoons and Monty Python views and spin this into a live action comedy spoof of an MMO (Massively Multiplayer Online Game).   If you play MMO’s and like movies, read on.  If you don’t like MMO’s you won’t understand much of the scenes I’m going to describe below.  You’ll have to use your mind to visualize what I have in mind.  Remember, this is just scenes in a movie that I’d like to see made.  There is no storyline, however I’m sure some Hollywood type could put a storyline easily into these scenes as it’s more about the spoof than it is the story, but all movies must have a good plot.  This stuff is what would make it funny.

Mount Summon

Picture if you will the calamity of something as simple as calling upon one’s mount.  A horse is in a meadow somewhere, eating away.  As animals do, he begins to pee.  At that moment, his master, a Dwarf Paladin summons his trusty stead.  It would probably sound something like this:

Crowd Control / Aggro Range

One thing that gets me about MMO’s is the crowd control and range of aggro for NPC’s.  If you don’t understand the term aggro, it means how aggressive a target is to the player.  If you get too close and it is a target that does not like you, it will attack you.  Aggro also determines if there is a group of players, the one that pisses off the target the most, get’s the most aggro.  In a game, there are many times, that if it were a real life situation, the target would plainly see you, and for some reason not care that you were there as long as you don’t get too close.

So you can be standing around, chatting with your buddies talking out loud how you will handle the situation and the target would just be standing there ignoring you.  The irony that you are about to kill an enemy and he just doesn’t seem to care.  You know that wouldn’t happen in a real battle situation, so in a way it’s funny.

It gets even funnier when you throw in crowd control.  In a gaming situation, players can stun, poly morph and otherwise detain targets for later throttling.  So you have Bill and Bob who are your targets.  They could be standing there discussing their lunch plans and even though they can see the people about to kill them, they pay no attention.  Furthermore, Bob suddenly turns into a goat unable to defend himself and Bill is just gibbering away as if nothing is happening.  That is until his attackers kill him in a shortly lived battle.  Poor Bob get’s struck, turns back to himself and is quickly defeated.  All the while, just a few more feet away.   Carl, another target pays no mind.  In a live action movie, it would be funny.

Wipe / Reset

Here ya go.  You see a group of people run into a battle.  Things go wrong and suddenly everyone of them dies.  Magically they are standing up in a different place away from where they were as if nothing has happened.  Except you see their armor tattered and damaged.  As they regain awareness they begin to blame one another for what went wrong and complaining about having their armor repaired and the costs involved.  Perhaps one or two them leave after saying some unkind words about the healer or the most heavily armored not doing their jobs.

Food Repairs All Wounds

Here’s an opportunity for a small scene where the battle has ended.  The wounded are now taking a break to attend their wounds.  Their armor still broken, but the bloody cuts and bruises suddenly vanish as they eat some bread or meat.

Drinks Replenish Magic

Picture a tired Mage, Wizard, Shaman or Priest just stumbling off to the side after a vigorous battle and sitting down for a drink.  Minutes later, poof back in action like nothing happened.

Critters

See a group of people on their way to some place, battle or just hanging out.  Each of them with a small animal doing odd things just because they can.  I can see this becoming in and of itself hilarity.

Respawn after Death (NPC)

Scene of a town being attacked.  The NPC who earlier has been shown to have limited vocabulary, is suddenly killed by the enemy threat.  Mid battle, poof, like nothing happened and happy as a clam.  Death again… This could go on for like 3 to 4 times before it looses it’s humor.

Respawn after Death (Player)

Nothing like a live action battle to see someone do a death scene.  Only to find themselves a few yards away, wounded but able to rejoin the battle and they run back into action yelling “BUFFS!!!”.  To a non-gamer, this would likely confuse them as the audience of gamers laughed.

Glowing, Flaming and Other Goofy Armor

A live action movie with all the fancy armor you see in games.  Could you just see the warrior wearing flaming armor just sweating to death from the heat and catching things on fire at random or other people lighting their smokes or cooking from his/her armor.  The flaming sword, that they can’t put away without injury.  Glowing armor making it hard to sneak up on enemies.  Lightening covered armor causing havoc.

This list could go on and on.  To an imaginative person, this could be one funny movie.  Live action with all the quirks found in most multiplayer games.  I think someone should make such a movie.  If I had the money, I’d certainly try to hammer out such a potential comedy hit 🙂

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